Break the Financial Chains

Here in America, we are encouraged to take out credit cards, loans, and mortgages regularly. Debt is the norm and 80% of Americans have it. The average household debt is $130,922. Approximately 70% of all cars are purchased with a loan. The overwhelming majority of homeowners have a mortgage. Despite all of these horrifying statistics, we continue to be hounded to buy more. According to a Yankelovich study, the average American is exposed to over 300 ads per day. We are bombarded with pressure to buy things everywhere - billboards, magazines, tv, radio, mail, by phone, and even at your front door. Companies are not shy to ask, and even demand, your business. 

Companies may not be shy, but many of us are embarrassed and ashamed to discuss our financial woes. Many of us feel isolated and alone in our sea of debt, and we desperately try to keep up the appearance that everything is ok. Debt, in so many ways, allows us to keep up the illusion that we own a nice home, drive a great car, and can afford our daily Starbucks. No one ever has to know that everything has a monthly payment attached. 

So, what's the big deal? Can't we all just get along with a little debt?

Many Americans do live with substantial debt successfully, for awhile. The problem with debt is that it requires mercilessly consistent payments. Get sick? Too bad. Your car payment won't wait. Getting married? Nope, you're not getting a break. Experience a major loss? Your mortgage won't be showing you any sympathy. Debt ensures that the endless working machine runs smoothly and keeps you showing up every day. The myth is that slavery was abolished in America. The difference today is we have the choice to become enslaved, or opt out. 

If you are one of the many Americans who are feeling weighed down by the heavy burden of debt, rest assured there is hope! It does take some work and dedication, but financial freedom is real! Taking steps toward freedom starts with education and writing a personalized financial plan. Hiring a coach and taking workshop courses can be beneficial in this process, no matter how deep you feel your financial hole is. I myself (Jill Landis) was in $30,000 dollars worth of debt, aside from my mortgage, when I started this process. I felt overwhelmed and hopeless. Once a educated myself and put together a plan, I felt hopeful and inspired. It took me three years to become debt-free, minus the mortgage. I am now steadily chipping away at that. There is hope for everyone, regardless of the circumstances!

The benefits of living a debt-free life are endless. When an individual operates from a place of financial health, relationships improve, emotional security increases, and most importantly, personal freedom expands. From a place of financial freedom, a person is free to dream bigger than their 9 to 5. Perhaps you'd like to start a business. Rid yourself of the unease that comes with a heavy burden of debt. Are finances a topic of tension in your marriage? Get your financial future in order and watch how the peace and security in your relationship blossoms. There is nothing like the sweet taste of independence and freedom that comes from owing no one anything. 

How are you building your financial freedom? Do you have unaddressed debt that consistently drains your energy and attention? Do you have a financial plan for your future? How are you managing the resources that the universe has entrusted you with? 

Tell me all about it! I'd love to hear about your successes and challenges! 

Master or Slave

Today, I want to talk about a very scary issue that has caused so much damage and grief in my life. That topic is Finances. Throughout the last year I feel like I have gained so much clarity about finances in my own life and how it fits into the bigger picture.

My experience with money has been mainly bad. It has been used as a tool to manipulate me, control me, and punish me. It has been stolen from me and it has been used to take advantage of me. And there has never, EVER, been enough of it. In working with my mentor, I have discovered that I have a huge resentment toward money and I hate the fact that it can affect my life so much. So, how to unravel all of these feelings and uncover the all of the positive that money can bring...

Money is simply an extension of self. Read that again. It is not bad, good, or moral. It is simply a manifestation of our decisions, discipline, and priorities. Often, when there is chaos and turmoil going on within, it will show in our finances. So it was for me. I had poor boundaries - I was stolen from (over and over). I had low self worth - I spent more money trying to rescue others than on my own self care. I had low self confidence - it was easy to manipulate me with money and hang it over my head. I felt powerless and helpless over my own money and future, therefore I manifested poor spending habits and choices. There are other examples but these are the most prominent. Now, imagine what happens when those inward battles begin to shift. Boundaries are set. Self care becomes a priority. Self confidence happens. Empowerment happens. And now, the finances start to look a little different...

"Money is an excellent slave or a horrible master."

Cleaning up my insides feels good and so does cleaning up my finances. It is hard being patient for change to take place in the area of financial success. Although attitudes and choices can change fairly quickly, finances often take years to clean up. You can dig a hole of debt in a year that can take ten years of dedication to pay off. Whatever the individual case may be, financial discipline is an opportunity to develop character and patience. It is also an opportunity to see how rewarding money can be. Money is unruly, but once I determined to refuse to be ruled by it, my life (and my money) changed.

I have been surprised to find that the abundance of money does not produce contentment and happiness; rather it is the lack of need for it.

When I am taking excellent care of myself and working on myself, I do not have the urge to shop for things I do not need. I do not care to indulge in needless food or unhealthy random purchases. I don't have to have a Starbucks coffee just because I left the house. I don't have the impulse to buy something simply because I haven't bought anything in awhile or because I am simply in a store. I cannot count the times I have recently walked into a store, grabbed a cart, looked for an item that I couldn't find, and then I was ok to WALK OUT WITH NOTHING. A few years ago I would have made sure to buy something just because I was in the store. Sometimes, I didn't even like what I was buying. Today, my financial wellbeing is more important and rewarding. And it feels so good.

Today, I can honor myself through paying off debts and regularly paying myself (saving). I don't have to be dependent on others because I have planned for the future. I don't have to worry about people taking advantage of me because I have the ability to say "no" when something doesn't honor me. I don't have to rescue others with my money because I don't have to prove I am a good person that way. I don't have to spend in order feel in control of my life because today I make empowered choices that don't make me feel helpless. I can't say that money feels entirely great yet, but it is feeling better and better. One day, I expect to have a fantastic and healthy relationship with money and my relationship with myself improves.

What has money helped you discover about yourself? Is your relationship with money damaged, or have you successfully developed a loving interaction? Is money your master, or your slave? I would love to hear your thoughts below or in a message at defytheaverage@gmail.com